As a teacher, we talk a lot about philosophy. The word whereby it means a system of thinking of knowledge of understanding in a particular sect about a particular subject or a smattering of sorts. And it's tough when your philosophy doesn't necessarily align with the currently philosophy that is being nudged upon you. A colleague of mind-a creative soul and myself have talked all year regarding the high-stakes testing atmosphere that has seemed to overtake our own philosophies. And truly, life is not life without a struggle at some point in your life where someone or something is challenging your philosophy-your way. And you are forced to make a choice. Will I continue? Or Will I flea or fight back?
For my colleague- I admire her strength. Because despite her circumstance, she found she needed to find herself and her philosophy again. And once clear it was becoming very muddy, oozing with dirst, unable to be cleansed. And so she applied to a job at one of the most creative and liberating schools in the heart of Oakland.
Just last week, she had convinced me that there was no more hope. Just last week, she had convinced me that, had she been chosen, she would have been contacted by now. Just last week she had told me she had already started planning for next year.
Until today she came running into my classroom with her car keys to tell me that she had landed her philosophy. She had found her way. She had been hired at a place that welcomed her and understood her and was going to make her shine forth the love and creativity she possesses. And though I have cried for others before, it had not been a very long time. But I did. I jumped up and down and screamed and began to cry with her because...
I get it.
I get that sometimes your way is the only thing you are holding onto. And when that is taken away, it feels as if what you are doing makes no sense, provides no sense of comfort, contains no real freedom. I get that "the way" is not to be taken lightly. And that sometimes it takes a difficult situation but a seemingly beautiful bird to take flight and travel in a different direction than they once thought imaginable.
And so I think, as humans, it is important to seek new philosophies but also realize when we are quite lost. When we need to land in a different place. When we need to glide over the green grasses and into the waters of our own way. Because at some point, we each realize what "our way" is and it can never be taken away from us but only lost temporarily. Lead your way. Lead the way. Follow the shadow to the other side.